btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Randomize
