so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
