Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
