Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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