Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
your room smells of hookers.
And success
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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