my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
