and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
