Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize