I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
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