...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I came so hard my ears popped.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
