I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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