You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
