After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
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