I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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