butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
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