It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
