Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
