does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
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