I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
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