She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I will pee on everything he values.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Randomize
