Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
