You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
There's always time for handjobs
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Randomize
