we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
