I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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