I want to stick my p in your. b.
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
