We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Randomize
