I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
