ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
two words: eviction party
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize
