we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
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