I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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