New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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