I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
