seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Randomize
