you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
