I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
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