She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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