Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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