ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize
