Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
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I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
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Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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