WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
You ate ashes out of my bong
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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