I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
Randomize