You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
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