At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
She even gives head with a lisp.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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