that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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