i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.