no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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