I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
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