I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
