I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize