She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize