hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Let's get the cat blown out
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Randomize
